Today was totally unproductive. I fell asleep after the kids left for school and slept till 10:30. I woke up in time to get a text from Katie and arranged to pick the girls up early from school so they could get to grandma and grandpas early so they had time to prepare for the haunted trail walk at Quarry Hill. Lot’s of early going on here. I am not sure what set me off but I have been feeling angry and blah for the last few days, as evidenced by my shoddy eating. The only bright spot in this is that I am still tracking what I am eating even though I am not eating as well as I should be. I am eating with awareness even though my awareness is telling my diet to fuck off.
Coincidentally today’s chapter discusses the nurturing power of food, aka emotional eating. Remember when I said I didn’t think I was an emotional eater? Apparently a week before my period I turn into one. This isn’t an excuse; it is a physical reaction to the hormonal changes in my body before my period. I do not have to let it rule me though.
Yesterday we learned about two bites and how those first two bites are the only ones that pack any emotional power. Any bites after that do not make me feel better, in fact they make me feel worse with each subsequent bite which in turn ruins the power of those first two to make me feel better. It’s a vicious cycle born of habit.
I am playing catch-up right now so I will be posting pretty short entries concerning the next 3 days.
Today’s takeaway: Throw the rest away, or put it back in the cupboard, or the fridge, or maybe I can just learn how to prepare foods in smaller quantities.