In the past when I tried to follow self-help books I started with a rigid set of rules concerning how I was going to follow the advice. Today Linda Spangle and I discussed what she refers to as a magic notebook. In the past I would have looked for a notebook that I could designate as magic, it would end up being a 50 cent composition notebook from the dollar store and I would have gamely struggled for a few days to find the right way to make it magic to me.
I briefly thought about the magic notebook, and quickly realized that I already have two. More than that I suppose if I count my awesome fitness group on Facebook, which I DO! Three, I have three magic notebooks at my disposal, and because of technology (oh shit wait! I have FOUR because I have to count my phone that connects me to each of the three magic notebooks immediately AND has a notebook app of it’s own, so does that make five then?). I have 5 magic notebooks at my disposal, each of them connects me to real people who I know love me and wish me no harm, who will provide the moral support I need in any situation I am facing.
I have the magic notebook situation totally under control. NEXT.
Linda discusses what we should write about in our magic notebooks. I was a little leery of this exercise as I am not really copacetic with anyone telling me what I should or should not do. Which kind of makes it hard to tackle a self-help book so I soothed my bristles and listened to her for a minute.
Food cravings do me in. That is when I need to refer back to the exercise about making excuses (which, incidentally is another great thing about my magic notebooks, I have access to all my earlier posts as ways to keep me positively on track) and then I don’t make the excuse and I make the good choice because I made a commitment to do so.
Yesterday I was out of the house at dinner time and by the time I got somewhere I could get something to eat, it was after my self-imposed 6:30pm cut off time. Was I tempted to stop at McDonald’s for a Shamrock Shake? You fucking better believe it. And when I went into SuperAmerica to buy a turkey sandwich and veggie cup do you think I was tempted by the literal aisle of candy and cookies and chips and Little Debbie cakes that led to the healthy food? Oh yes my friend. I was sorely tempted. Sort of like DJ Jesus in Temptasia.
The big question I was dying to know was, could I possibly make it out of that hell store with ONLY a turkey sandwich and vegetables?
Back to listening to Linda about writing my cravings in my notebook. It makes sense to me, because as she says, getting it out of your skull and onto a piece of paper or blog removes the bulk of its power to entice you. I do this with Envisage all the time, more so after the attempted murder than now, but more than enough to recognize the logicality of the exercise.
I made it out of the gas station with healthy food and my sanity intact, I ate the food before 8pm as my backup plan asked me to, and didn’t eat anything else before collapsing in bed at 1:30am.
Day Five’s Exercise asks me to write down the the foods I am craving and to promise to allow myself to have them someday, just not today. The cupcake has released its power on me (this is a funny sentence and I can’t read it without snorting) because I have recognized it as something I want and have told myself that I can have it some other time, just not today. It is kind of awesome the power that statement holds. I still want it, but the desire for it is not wearing away my resolve to be healthy. In addition to that I am no longer allowing my desire to be my excuse. If I choose to eat a cupcake today it is because I choose to do it and the responsibility lies with no one but me.
Also, when I do allow myself to eat that fucking cupcake it’s not going to be one from the gas station. Oh hell no. It’s going to be homemade ones that make my taste-buds feel like fainting.
- Yoga with Tara Stiles
- Finish my paragraph and start the 2nd one
- Write down my cravings and tell them to fuck off until another day
- Drink more water