Day Two: What Exactly is Commitment?

Dictionary.com defines commitment like this:

com·mit·ment

http://sp.dictionary.com/dictstatic/d/g/speaker.swf [kuh-mit-muhnt]  Show IPA

noun

1. the act of committing.
2. the state of being committed.
3. the act of committing, pledging, or engaging oneself.
4. a pledge or promise; obligation: We have made a commitment to pay our bills on time.
5. engagement; involvement: They have a sincere commitment to religion.
Linda Spangle describes me to a T in her Day Two activities.  I cannot count the amount of time I have spent lying in bed, awake at midnight, going through a list of the things I am going to do to be better tomorrow, they always start with Yoga or exercise.  I plan out a schedule that will work like nothing else.  I make my midnight commitment, turn over, go to sleep, and wake up the next morning with only a vague recollection of what my brilliant plan consisted of.  I eat a donut for breakfast while thinking about how I should be working out.  Turns out I’m not committed at all, I am at best vaguely interested in expending the energy necessary to turn my body back into the one I loved so much two years ago.  It also turns out that that is fucking stupid.
Vague interest be damned!  Commitment is not scary, I am not a teenage girl afraid of being hurt.  I am a grown up women who has everything that can be under control, under control except . . . wait . . . except what?
My Day Two exercise asked me to write about how I would commit this time.  Easy!
I used to talk to myself about all the stuff I did wrong, but now I talk to myself about all the stuff I do right.
What are my most important personal goals?
    • To lose 35 pounds
    • To increase my already good health by consciously being healthier
In that order, no matter how backward it may seem.  This is my weightloss and I get to do it my way.
How am I going to meet these goals?
By exercising regularly in different and successively more difficult ways, and by making consistently good nutrition choices.
What about when I act like a little bitch?
  • I will refer back to and re-read my most important personal goals.
  • I will make and COMMIT to a system of rewards related to food.
  • I will remind myself that there is no valid excuse, this is a choice and I am the one making it.
I will also remember that I used to think this was too fat, I thought this was ugly and unworthy, and I will remember that I was wrong.

Waste time self judging much? QUIT IT!

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One thought on “Day Two: What Exactly is Commitment?

  1. Pingback: Day Eleven: Let’s Talk About Food | Holy Crap! That's Delicious!

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